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Readers like you contribute to Aleteia's Mission. Purity and chastity seem to be virtues that have gone out of fashion.
Sexually active men are considered "winners" and women "experienced," while someone who saves him or herself in chastity is taken to be a prude, sexually incapable, or repressed by the Church. However, the reality is completely the opposite. It promotes good communication in dating.
When a couple practices abstinence, their communication is good because they are not just focused on pleasure but on the joy of sharing their views and experiences; moreover, their conversations are deeper. By contrast, physical intimacy is an easy way to relate, but it overshadows other forms of communication. It is a way of avoiding the real work involved in emotional intimacy, like talking about deep personal issues and working on the basic differences between the two of you.
The friendship in your relationship grows. Physical closeness can lead teenagers think they are emotionally close, when in fact they are not. A romantic relationship essentially consists in cultivating a friendship, and there is no friendship without conversation and shared interests. Some young people are driven by passion, and when they get to know each other more deeply, they end up disenchanted.
And they did not get to know each other because they never got to be friends; instead, they were "friends with benefits. There is a better relationship with both sets of parents. When men and women respect each other, their love matures and improves their friendship with both sets of parents. Generally, parents prefer their unmarried children to live lives of sexual continence, and they are concerned if they know their children are sexually active without being married.
We find ourselves in a physical shell, but we are not our body. We are a unique spirit that possesses a unique soul that resides in a body. Not only do your bodies become one, your spirit and soul become connected as well.
The consequences of that are much greater than most people realize. You connect the most essential part of yourself to the other person. You literally reveal yourself. You make yourself vulnerable. You give up your intimacy. You not only give your most sensitive, delicate part of your body to another person but you also open your inner being to the other person. Your heart is more involved than you realize. Your spirit is involved. Your soul is involved along with your feelings and your thoughts.
You connect a very deep, very beautiful and very fragile part of yourself with another spirit, soul and body. The only safe, healthy way to do that is in a relationship that is surrounded by a safe wall of trust and security. When you marry someone you promise to commit, care and protect them for life. You offer each other a safe place where you can expose yourself with trust, together with God who surrounds and keeps you in his hands with eternal love and goodness.
If you give yourself prematurely to the other and that relationship ends, it will likely result in excruciating emotional pain. Only within the boundaries of a healthy marriage will you be able to give yourself safely to the other. There are numerous couples who believed they would spend the rest of their lives together, but broke apart after some time.
In the beginning they were convinced they would end up together and having sex before marriage seemed a good idea. Everything seemed to be rosy. But nothing is as variable as the heart of man and love can change.
Nothing is as vulnerable as an emotional relationship that lacks a strong foundation. Millions of people have had a relationship they felt would last forever but ended in heartbreak. If you have been connected to the other person on a physical and spiritual level that is now torn apart, the wound is much deeper than most people realize. Many have been traumatized for life over the loss of a broken relationship.
God wants to protect you from that. He wants you to experience the fullness and happiness of a blessed sexual relationship. He wants you to experience security in intimacy, not rejection, humiliation and brokenness. He wants you to experience a loving bond and connection with each other. God has created you. He has made your heart, your soul, your spirit, your deepest feelings and emotions.
Even the strongest of men who present themselves as being tough are ultimately small children who long for tenderness and safety. Many women know this. God knows that broken relationships can scar you, sometimes for life.
That is why the Bible says: Sexuality belongs within the safe covenant of faithful love, in a marriage of two people who promise to protect and care for each other for life. True love is not based on feelings of infatuation but on loyalty and commitment. God has intended sex to be within the bounds of marriage because he wants you to enjoy your life partner to the fullest.
Then you have already given away that part of yourself to someone else. Virginity is a precious gift. Society makes us believe it is a good thing if you spoil yourself with others before you commit to one single person. People who think like that do not know love.
They live in mental poverty. But if you have given your life to Jesus Christ , you have become royalty, a beloved and precious child of the Most High King, God Himself. You are now a precious beloved of the Creator of sexuality.
He wants to give to you what the godless world has lost. However this requires patience and discipline. One of the dangers of sex before marriage is that you develop a relationship based on the sexual pleasure you experience together.
But that is temporary. It is by no means a foundation for a happy life together. Countless people get married and shortly after file for divorce because the dream changes into a nightmare.
Or they themselves turn out not to be the person the other expected them to be. So how do you prevent this? That is how you discover the real person. The feeling can be so intense that you desire it again and again. The continuous relationship drama will be a horrifying and sobering experience.
But by then it is too late. He fears that these groups could become more influential in because the Netherlands, France and Germany are holding elections, and many people fear that populist forces will use their power to incite hatred against minorities.
Germany's right-wing populist AfD has often made homophobic comments, but most of the mainstream parties have clearly positioned themselves in favor of equality ahead of September's general election. The Chancellor has told a Berlin audience that she wants a "decision of conscience" on the issue of same-sex marriage.
Merkel presented herself from a more personal side in the interview - three months before elections. The Bundestag has voted to rescind all convictions for homosexuality from the post-war period. Germany's LGBT community has described the vote as "historic," albeit not without its shortcomings. A new study has found that homosexuals in Germany don't think ads mirror their lifestyle. On a warm and sunny afternoon in Neukölln, a family with kids started verbally abusing a gay man before they attacked.
He was only saved when a good Samaritan stepped in to help. Germany's highest court has extended gay adoption laws to bring them in line with rules that apply to heterosexual couples.
Judges ruled that existing laws were discriminatory. Voters in Taiwan have recently rejected legalizing same-sex unions in a referendum. Taiwan's young generation lost because of a more backward-looking majority of older Taiwanese, says Alexander Görlach. Intolerance comes with age and location can play a part, too, according to a new study. Most German children said they are friends with kids from other countries. Education Minister Anja Karliczek has come under fire for questioning Germany's move to legalize gay marriage and the welfare of children of same-sex couples.
Opposition lawmakers criticized her "sham arguments. DW News presents the most important news — in brief, quickly and up-to-date. Change it here DW.